Friday, June 9, 2006 | The city of San Diego is short on cash? Solution: Cut more employees. Need money to finance new libraries, parks, road repairs, and fire stations? Answer: freeze city employee salaries and flexible benefits. Need a scapegoat for the pension underfunding mess?

Solution: Blame it on the employees and renege on promises made to them of a secure retirement after their 30 years of dedicated service.

Have to improve images of tarnished politicians and restore public trust after years of mismanagement at the top? Obvious answer: Spend $1 million to create ethics office and “train” lower level employees on the importance of work ethics.

Want to streamline government and maximize efficiency? Solution: Implement business re-engineering by hiring department heads with six-figure salaries and cut the low-paid workers who haul the trash, pave the roads, answer the phones and keep the city running daily.

Trying to placate business owners who give political support at the polls? Solution: Outsource work. Need more money for outside attorneys and consultants to untangle the city’s financial straits? Answer: Cut more employees and just say “no” to raises. Still looking for ways to balance the budget? Quick-fix remedy: Don’t ever suggest tax increases. Just cut more employees. Hey – where did all the employees go?

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.