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The only thing worse than having your beach overrun by a bunch of chest thumping Bajagua lobbyists, is to have it be the location of the annual San Diego Summer Beach Riot Bowl Series. And true to form, Pacific Beach rocked on Labor Day when the surf-trunk wearing PB Bros pummeled the blue-uniformed SDPD Beach Patrol.

Thank god San Diego is good at something. Since we also lead the nation in the Municipal Corruption Scandal Series, it was awesome to see our hometown gleefully covered by the international media.

Way to go San Diego!!!

Beach Rioting has a distinguished history in San Diego. The Mac Deda Destruction Company Windansea parties were legendary near-riots each summer.

The Mac Meda Destruction Company was also known for its “conventions,” as they called the big parties they threw at Windansea and other locales. One vintage photo of a major Mac Meda party at Windansea that included beer kegs and a rock band shows the presence of 10 police cars, two police motorcycles and two paddy wagons. “Back then,” Macpherson told Longboard, “the cops hated us so much that you could get arrested for walking down the street in a Mac Meda shirt.”

The Imperial Beach Sand-Gangland-Castle Competition featured a gang riot last summer. Mission Beach is host to a semi-regular Beach Gang Warfare bowl subdivision. OB, in the spirit of its hippy-dippy image is more Night of the Living Dead than The Warriors, with an inspiring alcohol fueled drunk fest 24/7. The rioting at Casa Beach is a more urbane affair with seal activists and nutty anti-animal activists battling it out during the Winter Beach Riot Season.

Of course the granddaddy Beach Riot of all time, was the legendary 1986 OP Pro Huntington Beach Riot Bowl Championship described in Transworld Surf by Rick Devoe

..my friend and I were walking around behind the scaffolding when we heard a bunch of yelling and then fighting. It was at that moment the Huntington Beach riot started-right in front to us.

We were young, so we were shitting our pants watching all these drunken dudes throwing rocks and running around like animals. We kind of backed up toward the scaffolding, hoping we wouldn’t get dragging into what looked like a huge mosh pit on the beach. Everyone on the beach was going crazy. About twenty yards away from us a cop car got flipped over and then, Bam! -the thing caught on fire. We looked for somewhere to run. When we ran out, we were smack dab in the middle of the riot again. By this time, the cops were charging after everybody swinging their batons. All hell had had broken loose.. As we started running, I heard footprints literally pounding behind me in the sand. Before I could turn around, I heard a loud thump and my friend’s voice yelping. I spun around to see my friend on the ground. A cop had just nailed him on the leg with his baton. The cop was standing over him in a rage. I stood there for a second and made eye contact with my friend. “Run, Rick!” he shouted. (It reminded me of a scene from one of those Vietnam movies where the guy’s buddy is wounded and he yells, “Go on without me!”)

Having grown up in IB where bikers, vatos and criminals swilled beer and ingested various illegal drugs round the clock for a great vibe of chaos and violence, I can tell you that beach alcohol bans work. IB banned beachfront alcohol and the beach became far safer. Unfortunately, our annual Sandcastle Gangfest each summer is an excuse for public drunkenness until the Sheriffs swoop down, make arrests and clear the area with helicopters.

Should the City of San Diego ban alcohol in OB, MB and PB? Of course it should. Like many parents I travel to the beach with my groms to surf and enjoy the water. Who wants their family to get in the middle of a bunch of ex-frat boys involved in a drunken brawl?

More than likely everyone in PB will forget about Drunk Fest 07 until next year until after the July 4th Beachside Garbage Festival and the Beach Riot Bowl Championship arrives at the nearest former family friend beach. Until then we only have the much tamer Casa Beach Riots to look forward to.

Hail Caesar, those who are about to die salute you.

— SERGE DEDINA

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